Woman: An Adult Female Human Being
Art & Words by Fanitsa Petrou
“…when they take away from us the power to name ourselves, to self-determined what we are, they also take away our power to define our place in this world, to articulate our pain, to safeguard our boundaries!…”
The appropriation of the female experience by trans-identifying men, who while enjoying male privileges are robbing women of the fundamental right of self-determination, and at the same time are being congratulated for the fact, is admittedly, a pretty nifty Patriarchal trick!
We are being told with hammering insistence by trans-activists and their many allies, for example, that sex is “assigned at birth”. As if by whim. But of course, it is not. It is observed. Using one’s eyes. And not even at birth, since it is evident from the early stages of pregnancy. But the term “assigned at birth” is useful to the political agenda of the trans movement, as it suggests a victimisation, a violation, a restriction that is cruelly enforced on the individual at the moment of birth by close-minded parents, and phenomenally ignorant medical stuff, taking away a child’s options. Conveniently, rendering sex, a matter of option. When we point out the obvious: that sex is by definition binary, not a ‘spectrum”; that genetics, DNA, how many X or Y chromosomes you were born with, cannot change just because any of us says so, we are told that we are hateful transphobes. But regardless of the political agenda of trans-activists, biology matters. It can’t be erased, altered or chosen. Which explains why men calling themselves trans “women” can still get prostate cancer, and why trans “men” face the same gynaecological conditions as the rest of us, including getting pregnant. No matter what they “self-identify” or what they choose to wear, their biology is irrefutable. What makes any of us male or female is anything but a choice. And even long after we die, scientists from the future will see our differently shaped skeletons and DNA remnants and will know exactly (and easily) what we were. Even if hundreds, or thousands of years go by…
Within Patriarchy, a woman is so insignificant, she is seen as nothing but a notional construction (in a man’s brain), and therefore any man can “become” a woman, simply by announcing it! And he is accepted and recognized as one, simply by mirroring the patriarchal supposition of what a woman is. (If that’s not power, I don’t know what is!) All the wonderful and complex things that make us women, are reduced in one stroke into a fashion choice. (How is it, that so many of us are perfectly fine with this?) And when they take away from us the power to name ourselves, to self-determined what we are, they also take away our power to define our place in this world, to articulate our pain, to safeguard our boundaries! By accepting that trans-“women” (that is: trans-identifying men) are “Women”, we are allowing men to change the definition of what a woman is, allowing them to gain access to, and dismantle all that we have fought for, in even more pervasive ways than before! (Who knew that it was possible?)
“Biological” women are unfairly “privileged” we are now being told for example, in relation to trans “women” (that is, trans-identifying MEN), because “biological” women (or “cis women” as they now call us) have female sexual organs, which is apparently offensive as a reality, and seen as an actual threat to the rights of transgender individuals! So much so, that the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), the largest LGBT civil rights advocacy group in the United States, has suggested (back in 2017) that doctors use the term “front hole” instead of “vagina”, while the British Medical Association has suggested the term “pregnant people” as an alternative to “pregnant women” so that trans individuals are not “victimised” and “offended” by the biological realities of women… Of course, any woman who dares to point out the absurdity of that, is seen as a “TERF” (=Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist), as a deeply prejudiced individual who fails to see Trans-identifying men as “real” women. But a LOT has transpired since then. Now we are additionally being denied the right to call OURSELVES “women” because that would be “offensive” to the men who call themselves that. We can no longer say “I have the anatomy, the biology of a woman” with that not being seen as a vicious attack on trans identifying men’s “rights”. Interestingly, men simply saying “I’m a woman because I feel like I am”, or “I’m a woman because I like wearing dresses” is perfectly – and instantly – acceptable, and not at all an insult to us all. But the thing is, calling trans-identifying males by their preferred pronouns is not “kindness” and “inclusiveness”, as we naively once thought. And it is certainly not an act without consequences, as it is daily proving to be antithetical to respecting women’s rights, and an open invitation to allowing the corrosion of our boundaries, safety and the very existence of Women as a political class (or a reality).
Yes, we can no longer say “I’m a woman” any more, without that being offensive to the men who have officially appropriated the term. When however, in order to denigrate us, they call us “bleeders”, “egg producers”, “menstruators”, “vulva owners”, “cervix havers”, “birthing bodies”, “chest feeders”, “bodies with vaginas”, “pregnant people” and “non-men”, because the word “woman” has been colonized by them, and it no longer belongs to us, we are denied the right to even object. How is it that so many, intelligent, well-intentioned individuals still fail to see the disrespect, the disdain, the mockery, the unmitigated contempt, the sheer misogyny that is hidden behind such words? That these terms are advertised as “inclusive”, but are the very opposite: they were crafted for the specific purpose of EXCLUDING women from their very sex, and from the very language that describes them, in order to rob them of the right to define themselves, and by that, DEFEND themselves. To trivialize their experience as actual females. To punctuate the message that the term “woman” is now taken. By them. By men!
(Like I’ve written elsewhere) a woman’s nature is not debatable, it is not a matter of interpretation, it cannot be undone (Or in its essence really be adopted. Only crudely masqueraded.) In a world that defines women merely by their body parts, that devaluates them BECAUSE of their biology, how interesting is it, that the essence of what they are, is so complex, and inimitable and so much more than merely that? A woman is still a woman if she has gone through hysterectomy, through mastectomy, clitoridectomy, or if she has not given birth, but a man’s masculinity is obviously a pretty fragile thing (literally as well as metaphorically). Men’s sexual organs (and mysteries…) are overt and uncomplicated. Men do not centre their sense of self around who, what they are (not really), but literally on their equipment. A knife can then un-man them, take away from them that which defines them. Diminish them, turn them into lesser beings (which is to say, “feminize” them) A concept that reveals not only what they really think of women (aka as penis-less, and therefore lesser creatures), but also of themselves as well: there’s nothing much else to them, other than their penis… Minus that, they actually think they become that which they secretly loath-and-envy: women! Which is of course where their trans self-delusions begin. Most of the contemporary trans-identifying men will of course not even go to such lengths. Despite of the fact that they want the entire world to acknowledge their new “identity” and they want us to unquestionably commit to it, they, themselves, won’t commit to it fully: unlike what many of us think, the vast majority of them will not go for castration (chemical or physical). All they will do is buy a dress, a wig, some fake breasts and some nail polish, and Voilà: they are self-proclaimed women. Because that is how they see us: as nothing more than their perception of femininity as determined within Patriarchal culture. Given that women are objectified and seen as nothing but the sum of their fuckable characteristics, a man’s symbolic castration is achieved by the mere mimicking of a woman’s outward appearance: any man in a dress, a pair of high-heeled shoes, long hair and painted nails, is automatically seen as a woman…
Biology has no place in the matter we are being told, and focusing on it, is equated with bigotry, because it has nothing to do with being a woman! But how can any of us defy our biology? It has shaped our journey, and the way it has been used against us, for thousands of years, has defined our place in this world. When man-made, self-serving religions and philosophies and theories and medical “sciences” and societal norms and laws were being constructed, bit by bit, by men, they used our very biology as a proof that we were “inferior” to them. Based on that, they proclaimed themselves as the “default” human beings in order to keep us subjugated: our smaller bodies, our lack of violent tendencies as well as our lack of muscle mass that couldn’t cause any damage to theirs when they attacked us, gave them the “authority” to rape and assault us with immunity, and on top of that, (and because of that) call us inferior to them, subhuman. And in turn, it also caused us to be in constant need of them so that we would be protected by the violence of other men who were always lurking out there. Which made us (literally, and by law, and for thousands of years) the legal property of our protectors / husbands who had the right to have sexual, economic, social authority over us. In short, our biology was always unfairly contrasted to that of males, and the differences between the two sexes were always seen as a “proof” that theirs is “superior” and our subjugation a “nessesity”. Men’s power is based on NOTHING other than our own physical powerlessness, which forces us into submission. This has defined how we are being treated, and why we are still being threaten, prejudiced against, silenced, used and abused. Individually and collectively, and for thousands of years. In short, male perceptions of what female biology is, were fundamental in our exploitation through the centuries, as these perceptions were used as a “proof” of a woman’ s “inferiority”, and as an excuse for her social exclusion, sexual exploitation, and economic dependency on men through marriage. And it ultimately gave men license to objectify, devaluate, dehumanize, intimidate, control, humiliate, abuse, assault, rape, kill us.
Everything about our biology was seen as “sub-par”. Our periods would brand us as filthy, mad, lunar witches. Our menopause which was coincident with maturity and an increased bravery, was believed to turn us into “crazy” dangerous bitches with “wandering wombs” that needed to be fixed with unnecessary cruel surgeries, isolation, or with confinement in mental institutions. Our sexuality was seen as an abomination and a threat. Our female bodies that triggered lustful thoughts in religious leaders of any persuasion of any century, were for this reason, branded as shameful in every religion (men created in their OWN image), and every woman was seen as the source of all sin, for simply existing in the same world as them, causing them to question their ability to walk on the path of self-righteousness they themselves had curved on stones. And their own male biology, (their aggression, their propensity for violence, their lack of discipline and respect for our boundaries, their own state of perpetual horniness they couldn’t tame, and which dominated their thoughts), informed their perception of us (rather than cause any degree of self-awareness in THEM) and became the building blocks with which their ideologies, religious doctrines, holy books, legal theories, philosophies, artistic creations, “sciences” about our OWN “inferior” and “sinful” natures, were constructed!
Our ability to birth every single person that had ever walked on this planet was downplayed, and then used against us, in order to keep us homebound, confined, powerless. It was trivialized instead of appreciated, so that men’s own minuscule one-second long contribution would be glorified! A woman bleeds monthly for as many as 45 years, the equivalent of the blood that runs through the bodies of 52 males in her lifetime, so that she can have the possibility – not even necessarily the ability – to bring life into this world. (Imagine what men would do with that fact, if it was THEM doing the bleeding – or God help us all, the birthing of human beings! The theories and religions and laws they would come up with, to justify their “superiority” over us, based on that alone! The nonsense about the sacredness of their male blood that would be formed into religious doctrines) And then a woman goes through the horrors of pregnancy and labor, and feeds her baby from her very body, but since the dawn of Time, it is a man’s sperm that was seen as the great magical ingredient in the creation of human beings. And his seconds long “contribution”, the most important part of it all. And therefore, the child a woman births will (even to this day, more often than not!) take the patronymic of the father, and because of that, sons (not daughters! NEVER daughters!) will be considered the continuation of HIS blood line (Never hers. Never the Mother’s own!) Much like the wife gladly takes the name of her husband (in fact she is indoctrinated to consider it even now, an honour!) as if her own family name – and blood line – never existed (or meant a thing!)
Entire religions were created to assure men that they matter more than us, and that their own biology was “superior” to ours, which gave them right to have unquestionable access to our bodies! God is a male entity, a Father we were told, and HE created the world. Not a female one. Not a primordial Mother. (Which would make 100% more sense, if symbolism AND reality are anything to go by) Eve came from Adam’s rib we were told. One of the many myths created so that women’s creative powers would appear as insignificant. So that men would appear as the sole source of life. If Adam existed, it was he who came out of a woman of course, not the other way round. How interesting is it, that it was (and is) easier to believe that a man had a pregnant rib, rather than a woman gave birth to a man! And yet, it was a notion that survived through the centuries and spread the word that we are biologically inferior, with no life-giving abilities! Despite the blatant daily evidence of the opposite, that takes place since the Dawn of Time. A notion that is common in many patriarchal religions and traditions. In Greek mythology, for example, it was believed the mighty goddess Athena, the most powerful of them all, was born not out of a mother, but from her father Zeus’s forehead… Which would explain why she was powerful… And now we retrograde again: simply saying that women give birth to children, or that women have wombs or periods, is actually considered hate speech!
What is happening now, is in many respects, NOT new. Men have been trying to control our biology and redefine it in ways that would rob women of their power and so make their subjugation easier, for thousands of years. The celebrated Greek philosopher Aristotle for example, came up with the notion that men are the sole “life givers”, and women are merely the “incubators”, the “potting soil” for the precious male “live seed”. Aristotle, (like I’ve written before) also claimed that mothers have no actual relation to their own children, since they are merely the “hosts” for as long as the pregnancy lasts. (That is why in ancient Greece, matricide was not considered a crime, while patricide was a very severe one…) A notion that was also a popular ancient Hebrew belief. In Aristotelian terms, (much like in the dystopian world of Margaret Adwood’s The Handmaid’ s Tale), mothers were merely the wombs that brought children into the world, and fathers had the reproductive ownership of those children (a tradition that survives to this day, in many places around the world of course). His theory has influenced Western thinking for centuries, and has left a lasting mark on Muslim and Judeo-Christian traditions (as evident in the utterly misogynistic writings of the Church Fathers – see below), and is finding new believers in present-day Christian religious fundamentalists and US Right Wingers: a good example is Rep. Justin Humphrey had claimed back in 2017 (in his efforts to pass one of the many American anti-abortion Bills) that a woman is merely a “host”, and once she decides to be “irresponsible” by having sex (the guy with whom she is having this sex, is of course blameless, just like in the Bible…) her body “is no longer her own” because she will always be a potential “host”!
Pythagoras may be known for his mathematical theorem, but he also came up with the theory of “spermism”, which claimed that fathers contribute the essential characteristics of their offspring, while mothers are just the “passive vessels” and contribute only a material substrate (the “surface” on which life given by the father, is “deposited”). A theory that in turn influenced 18th-century Christianity, as expressed in “preformationism” (or preformism), which was only one of the many similar theories that attempted to offer “evidence” that women are just “nurturers” and not actual parents to their kids! This particular theory, claims that there is a ‘homunculus”, (an actual miniature man!) inside every sperm, whom scientists actually claimed to be able to see through their microscopes (or should I say magic spheres?) and that of course offered a so-called “scientific” proof that only men give life…
That laughable misogynist, Freud, also had it wrong. We DON’T have a penis envy. (WHY would we?!) It was always men who were secretly in awe and envious of the complexities of the female body: trans identifying men are now shoving tampons up their asses and smearing their male intact organs with frozen tomato juice to simulate menstruation. They have drag shows in which they actually make fun of abortion by splashing red paint on their fake pregnant bellies! They are taking synthetic hormones and apparently an anti-nausea drug, to induce “lactation”, and then go on and “breastfeed” their babies, even though according to doctors, “there is no evidence to say this is safe” (or that it is milk…) And yet they don’t stop them! Because men must be placated, and their delusions, as well as their sexual fantasies and fetishes must be respected at all costs. (Apparently there’s a whole porn subculture that has sexualised the act of “trans breastfeeding”!) Instead of feeling sick by the idea, and deeply worried about their mental state and the health and safety and future of those poor kids, we are supposed to be moved by such acts, to applaud them, congratulate them, and on top of that, call these (obviously mentally disturbed) men, mothers! Women! A term that seems to only be relevant to them now. If to anyone at all. The Church of England for example, has recently announced that “There is no official definition of a woman”! Considering they knew who and what Eve was, and claimed that everything was her fault, and that every woman was “carrying her Original Sin” that caused the Fall of the entire humanity and all that, and considering they’ve embraced the misogyny of the bible to keep women out of any roles in the Church for hundreds of years specifically on account of their “inferior sex”, we can’t help but find it surprising they now say they don’t know what one is.
The Church Fathers, (Catholic, Orthodox, Anglican, Lutheran and everything in-between) certainly knew what a woman was when they were demanding that she accepts man as her rightful “master” – as all slaves ought to do… In their many “Holy” writings, they ordered her again and again to “be silent” (St Paul was particularly keen on that one), they called her “inferior in nature and law”, wrote that she is “evil above all other evil, snakes and venom against which no medicine is good” and assured men that her life’s purpose is to “serve and satisfy their libido” and that she is “a temple built on a sewer”, a “bag of excrement” and of course “the devil’s door”… They wrote that anyone who touches her during “her filthiness” (period) would also be “filthy”, and urged men to stone virgin girls for “allowing” men to rape them. And they had their own twisted views on how the sexes are formed (“The male seed gives birth to perfect shapes, that is, masculine, but if for some adversity it fails, then it gives birth to females, because in coitus with a woman there’s only deformities, turpitude, filth, filth.”) The list of misogynistic utterings which were described as “sacred” and the “Word of God”, is long and deeply disturbing. All of it written by “great” theologians, “holy” men and actual “Saints”, who were venerated for their virtue through the centuries (St. John Chrysostom, St Paul, St. Thomas Aquinas, St. Augustine, St. Ambrose, Tertullian, St Ireneus, St Jerome, Clement of Alexandria, Saint Albert the Great, et. et.) These examples are nice reminders that men have been saying nasty things about women for thousands of years without anyone questioning them, and without that having ANY consequences on them. On the contrary – and much like present day trans identifying men – they were revered because of it.
We shouldn’t kid ourselves that this archaic nonsense is gone. All of it had survived through the centuries shaping men’s view of what we are. And women’s views of what we can’t be. (And how much bullshit we ought to accept unquestionably) All of it, is still happening somewhere in some form or other, giving men license to silence, intimidate, oppress, assault, kill us. It has survived equally in the Jewish, Muslim and Christian traditions. And in the “new”, mostly American “born-again” Churches that merrily revive misogyny, and in the fundamentalism of the Far Right political parties, that strive to ban abortion and place back in the hands of men the full control of Women’s Reproductive Rights, in the US and elsewhere. And in the hypocrisy of the Leftist parties that are destroying women’s Rights for the sake of virtue signaling. And it has gloriously survived in the entitlement of (trans identifying) MEN who even today, still believe they are the only ones who can define what a woman is, and are allowed to say whatever they want about women with immunity. And sadly, it has also survived in the internalized misogyny of women as well, who would rather stand by a man who lies, rather than by a woman who fights for them.
Men pretending biology is not important, (only when it comes to women of course), and appropriating a woman’s nature, is hardly new… The primordial envy of the procreative capacity of women is as old as their need to subjugate us. In short, as old as Patriarchy itself. This is how our devaluation was allowed and excused. None of it would happen without our biology being what is it. That thing men objectify, lust after, loath, fear, and envy. And need to control, by religious, political means, ideologies, and violence. Contemporary trans-identifying men pretending biology is irrelevant to the reality, nature and experience of being a woman or appropriating a woman’s biology for their own means, while at the same time disrespecting her, is hardly novel or specific to their own Trans subculture: trans men, gay men and straight men are all in agreement win that one…
There’s a new cringe trend for example on social media (that eerily brings to mind the Handmaid’s Tale), with gay men posing lovingly for the camera, facing each other and holding hands (relax, that is NOT the cringe part) and in the distance, somewhere lost in the background, is their surrogate: a pregnant woman with her head always facing down dutifully, holding her belly. She is always kept in the shadow, an outline of a pregnant figure. A faceless, nameless womb for hire. Servicing men’s needs. Women’s biology mattering only when, and for as long as it it is useful to men. A female body to be used and discarded. Money exchanging hands making it all OK. (Same as it ever was…) Because adopting a child that is already born, and in need of love, is rarely a good enough solution. Their precious sperm MUST be involved in the transaction. Why shouldn’t they think like that? They are not the ones who are paying the real price after all. Much like heterosexual men in a similar position, all it takes for them is spending a few minutes masturbating while watching porn. The blood shedding, the pain, the actual sacrifices, are still, (despite all the fanfare about gender identity) a woman’s domain. (Funny how even those who are using the “Trans women are Women” mantra like a weapon against us, and who are outraged when we point out that biology and sex are a reality, when they want a surrogate they turn to an actual woman, not to a man pretending to be one…)
Similarly, straight men are invited to cut the umbilical cord of their baby, are praised, glorified for the fact. Because this is what we, as women do. This is what society at large does: we placate men, we are pandering to their need to feel important even when they do nothing to justify it. We include them where they have no place to be. We allow them to partake in our feminine “mysteries” so that they can feel important, respected. Thousands of years of oppression has taught us that we ought to. If we are to survive. Similarly, the men who are offered the gift of witnessing the miracle that is their child’s birth, have also somehow managed to make it about themselves. We are expected to congratulate them for their “bravery”, for simply witnessing that which someone else (their wife) was actually doing, through pain and suffering! We are also expected to congratulate them for their “sensitivity” if they couldn’t take it and left the room. And if they fainted? Well, we better build them a statue! They are the same sort of men who will also use the plural when talking about their wife’s pregnancy: as in “we are pregnant”, “we have morning sickness” “we have braxton-hicks contractions”, “we decided to breastfeed”. Their appropriation of the female experience will of course be considered by most women out there (including their wife who is the one who is actually going through all that), as an expression of compassion, instead of what it often is: a mans-plaining of sorts. A lame shot at the spotlight. A cost-free for them, appropriation of the female experience disguised as empathy… (A need that is obviously present in all men – trans, gay or straight)
Womanhood is not the wearing of dresses, the painting of the nails, the make-up, the high heels, the long hair, the passivity, the sexual availability and eagerness to please men. The gender specific characteristics, in short, that Patriarchy has decided are the definition of femininity. Womanhood is not a matter of perception, interpretation, preference, choice, or a feeling. It’s tough, it’s painful, it’s dangerous, it comes with heavy costs. That is why when we are being told that men “experience life as a woman” we have to laugh. Because we know for a fact that they don’t. As long as they don’t know what it means to have a period, a menstruation crump, a pregnancy, labour pains, a child birth, a miscarriage, an abortion, a hot flash, an episiotomy; they don’t know what it means to experience the pain or unpleasantness of pap smears, mammograms, IVF. They don’t know the endless variation of dangers we face: obstructed labour, postpartum bleeding, eclampsia, postpartum infection, birth asphyxia, neonatal hypothermia, postpartum depression, maternal mortality and the many female related gynecological disorders: Endometriosis, Fibroids, Polycystic ovary syndrome, Menstrual disorders, Ovarian cysts, Uterine prolapse, Infertility, Irregular bleeding, Pelvic inflammatory disease, Vaginitis, Cervical disorders, Dysmenorrhea, Female Genital herpes, Urinary Tract Infections, Heavy menstrual bleeding, Infections, and the different types of gynecologic cancer.
We are not just our biology I hear many of you say. No, we are not. But biology is not something we can ignore. It defines how we are being treated, how we have always been treated by men (of any persuasion. Or fashion choices). And that in turn, informs who we become. It defines our place in this world. Unlike trans-identifying men, we don’t need to convince anyone of who we are, by creating ideologies and using political agendas and threats to push the message. We know we are women. Our bodies tell us. That quicksilver running through our veins at puberty, and the self we are forced to leave behind for good at that moment. The innocence that we lose forever at the end of childhood (while boys are allowed to prolong theirs, indefinitely. Often, well into old age) The understanding that hits us like a brick. The constant vigilance against the ever-present threat of male violence, that will guide our steps from then on. Making our lives smaller. The endless precautions we will be taking every day of our lives. Because we are seen as nothing but bodies. Because no matter what we do, what we are, what we achieve, none of it will matter. Only our bodies. Our age. Our shape. In short, our fuckability. A man’s (any man’s) approval… And it is also the blood we monthly bleed. That signal our body sends us, as it prepares us for the possibility of a pregnancy. Whether we want it or not. Whether it will ever happen, or not. The cramps that double us up in pain while we soldier on, going through our day, not letting anyone know (and which would make grown men cry) And it is the constant fear of pregnancy; the painful or costly, or downright unpleasant or even seriously harmful in its side-affects birth control method, that it’s been decided it is solely our OWN responsibility – because the outcome will also be our own, life-long burden to bear. Because men don’t concern themselves with such things. (Only with the passing of laws to control our OWN bodies) And it is the pregnancies, the morning sicknesses, the cravings, the prayers we whisper in the dark as we feel a body growing in our belly. Elbowing our insides. As our own body expands and changes to contain it. It is that extra heartbeat in our body. And it is the darkness that covers us when we stop feeling it beating. The devastation that we will carry forever for the loss of a child we named, whose life we pictured, who was literally part of us, and who was gone before we even met it. And for most women, it is the cruelty of childbirth. That primitive and bloody business of bringing a human being into the world through excruciating pain. And it is the way the body will remember that pain it suffered, which will bond them forever with that child that came out of them, in ways that are simply alien to fathers. To men. And it is the baby’s cells that will migrate from mother to child and vice versa, healing each other (in the miracle that is called “fetal maternal microchimerism” which was not discovered until the 90s – science being slow at discovering all the wondrous mysteries the female body holds) when the baby’s DNA will leave a permanent imprint in their body for years, which remains embedded in both their tissues, becoming a permanent part of them! And it is the milk that will flow from them when their baby is hungry. Which will flow, even when someone else’s baby is crying in their vicinity. Because biology will send its primal signals. That biology that we are told is not significant to who we are. To what a woman is. And then it is the blood that will run out. That will leave us finally free from the monthly draining, but also, force us to take another evolutionary step drenched in new sufferings and new bravery, and new understandings of ourself. It is the sleeplessness caused by it, and the night sweats and the brain fog, and those moments when we will feel like our head is being shoved inside a 2,000-degree kiln, which if they lasted a second longer, they would burn us alive. And it is also our multiple orgasms, and the complexity of our thoughts and the depth of our emotions, and our ability to connect with others on levels that are just deeper… And it is our longevity too: our body and spirit’s ability to survive against ALL these odds!
And it is the body that ages and gets bigger, in a world that tells you it shouldn’t. Never. EVER! Because it is forbidden for you. Only for you. If you are a woman that is. So, for so many, it is also the life-long hunger, the deprivation they will impose on themselves. The ever present fear of rejection, (which they will mask as “health consciousness” of course) The need to be stuck in time in a prepubertal body, regardless of their age. The relentless effort to dutifully discipline a body that naturally graves comfort and pleasure and roundness. Because approval is not willingly offered to biological females who actually look like ones at their respective ages. Who are not eager to self-punish and walk the line. (The struggle against ageing and fat are the ONLY truly permissible – and universally acknowledged as necessary – fights a woman is allowed to have after all). The British comedian Eddy Izzard calls himself a “girl” at 62. How hilarious is that? Can you imagine a woman of his age doing the same? Or dressing as he does while being his age, and being gloriously accepted as he is, for doing both? Or indeed looking like he does dressed as he is dressed, and not being ridiculed, judged, publicly shamed? The request for high standards of perfection and flawless beauty and eternal youthfulness is saved for the REAL females. Any man (of any age, size, and shape) in a leather mini skirt, awkwardly sashaying on his high heels will be called “beautiful”, and let us not forget,”stunning!”, regardless for how he actually looks like. Because they KNOW he’s a man. Because looks still matter ONLY if you are a woman. (In this man’s world, that we all pretend that is changing…)
In short, being a woman is not about our clothes. It’s about a history of objectification, prejudice, and violence, which we all carry in our collective past as an oppressed class. And it is about our biology, our spirit, and the dangers we still face, and the multitude of wondrous things that our female bodies can create, and endure, and enjoy, in ways that are alien to men – regardless of their fashion choices and “preferred” pronouns. That are specific to our very binary sex – not anyone’s perception of it! That are unmistakably linked to our female nature. That are our core. That collectively spell out what a WOMAN can only be: An Adult FEMALE Human Being.
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Posted on the 20th of March, 2024. Art & Words Copyright © Fanitsa Petrou. All Rights Reserved. Any unauthorised use – copying, publishing, printing, reselling, etc – will lead to legal implications. Feel free to share on social media, by using the link.
On the same subject, read also: “That’s a Dude”
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